Different Day, Different Struggle

Today, I did not feel like eating at all. I had 0% appetite. There was absolutely nothing that appealed to me and everything I ate today was simply because I knew I had to eat -- that plus the fact that I was feeling a bit light-headed and was shivering (despite it still being hot here). Maybe I'm coming down with something, but it was probably a bit of low blood pressure + low blood sugar. It may also be a bit of stress. I've got a deadline coming up for a writing task and to be honest, I just don't feel like doing it - but I have to, so I will, but I'm grumpy about it!

Today would have definitely been an easy day to just skip from the gym. Aside from my excuse of not feeling well, it's a cultural/religious holiday today (the first one I'm celebrating without my family being here) and I guess that has me feeling a bit homesick and sad to be without my parents.

Still, I'm closest to being at my lightest weight in 6 or 7 years so ...

I headed to the gym. I set up a 5km goal on the treadmill and just zoned out to my music. I did a total of 15 minutes of jogging (not consecutive minutes) and walked the rest. My legs felt heavy in the beginning, but around 10 minutes in they started to loosen up, and by the time I had been on for 20 minutes, I felt good. My legs are still sore (still from Wednesday's CrossFit workout??) but the running/walking on an incline definitely helped stretch them out.


I feel like I've definitely been struggling a bit these past few days. Perhaps it's just a bit of fatigue. Nonetheless, I have never once thought about giving up or quitting. My attitude is different now. It's been developing into one that's much more aggressive about taking my health seriously and eager about making strides in improving my fitness level. It's still tough. I obviously struggle, especially with self-doubt, during a lot of workouts ... but I think it's time to look at some of the positive achievements that I've made over the past few months. My lifestyle and attitude have changed so much - and I love the change.

Aside from my own attitude, something that has helped has been surrounding myself with positive people, those who are either in a very similar place to where I am or those who get the process. Not everyone has been encouraging or accepting, but many people have. Plus now, after sticking with the Whole Life Challenge for 41 days, they can see that I'm serious - that not only am I doing the work, but I'm seeing the progress too. I was getting really frustrated at first, but I guess patience and persistence are needed with both the effort I put into my exercise as well as the approach I take to dealing with circumstances in life in general.

All these new realizations make me feel positive and optimistic. I'm hoping these attitudes will surpass those of apprehension and self-doubt.