Tuesday, October 16, 2012
I've had another incredibly hectic day.
I was up at 2:00 a.m. (only 3 hours of sleep) mainly because I was stressed/anxious about things that I had to do during the day --- partly related to work (papers to grade/presentation to prepare) but mostly related to my dad's hospital visit. I couldn't stay in bed so I just started my day just after 2 a.m.
The good news is that everything that needed to get done today did get done. However, it came with a lot of stress and anxiety throughout the day.
I spent 4 hours with my father at the hospital. He's doing ok, but he could be better. On our way home, as he was coming up the stairs, he fell.
I'm not a parent, so I don't know how it feels to see your child get hurt ... but what I do know is that when I saw my father on the ground, my heart hurt so much - it was unbearable. I immediately ran to him and helped him up. He was quite shaken and unfortunately also cut up and bruised a bit. We cleaned up the cuts and I bandaged him up ... but I was shaken for the rest of the day. I didn't want to let him out of my site. Strange how the roles reverse as we get older ...
By 3 p.m. I was so exhausted that my body was hurting and shaking from lack of sleep and stress. I tried to lie down for a bit and did doze for a few minutes ... but it wasn't enough.
My biggest worry - I wanted to get a workout in, but would I be able to?
After de-stressing a bit with D, I pulled myself together and got in a Zumba workout. I felt much better after that - a good ass-shaking usually does that.
Despite all the stress I felt today, not once did I think about turning to food to help me cope. There's nothing that food would do to help make my day any easier ... I just stuck to my usual plan. It's starting to feel normal for me now, and that definitely feels good. I didn't have much of an appetite, but I made sure I ate. I don't want to get into the bad habit of skipping meals and letting my emotions dictate how and what I eat. Stuff happens all the time; I just gotta learn how to deal with it in a normal way. No more excuses. I'm enjoying my newfound health and wellbeing way too much to throw it away.