New Beginnings

I woke up 45 minutes before my alarm this morning. I don't normally laze in bed, but I just was not ready to get up. Staying in bed is definitely the first risk of going off track with my day. As 7 a.m. rolled around, I started to think - It's so warm in bed. Do I really want to get up now? Maybe I need more sleep. - The little voice in my head would not stop! Luckily I shrugged it off and was out of bed and ready to start my day just a few minutes later.

Just that little incident made me realize how easy it is to get thrown off track, even when you've got the best of intentions! My excitement from yesterday hadn't dissipated, but still … the warmth of my bed nearly eliminated any chances of a successful, productive day.

Luckily that was not the case.

I made it to the gym for my morning workout. It had been a LONG time since I had been to the gym. In fact, I can't even remember the last time I did any weight training - probably sometime back in November or December. I definitely missed it.

After being away from weight lifting for so long, I was nervous about getting back into it. I was not looking forward to the soreness that was sure to follow in a couple of days. I was also not looking forward to noting down how much strength I had lost due to lack of training.

Still, I knew that the only way to rebuild my strength/muscle was to get back to it, so that's what I did.

back at the squat bar

The workout went a lot better than I thought it would go. I'm doing each exercise for 4 sets at 10 reps each. With the high number of reps, I wasn't expecting to be able to go super heavy ... definitely not at first. That being said, I'm pleased with how much I was able to lift today ... and I'm eager to see how the rest of the program goes.

After my lifting session, I got on the treadmill for an HIIT session. I decided to give the C25K program another try - after all, I was so close to finishing it before. I'm disappointed that I never completed it. I'm going to see how it goes - I hope my knees hold up. For today, it went well. I didn't go super fast on my jogging portions, but it was fast enough for me to be a bit breathless at the end. I'll keep upping the intensity gradually as I proceed through the program.

I ended my training with some core work, Jiu-Jitsu drills, and yoga. I had not done a deep stretching session in a long time and it felt really good. Even though I have been stretching daily as part of the whole life challenge requirements, today I spent 30 minutes stretching and using my foam roller. It was heavenly!

So my first day on my new routine went well. I was on point with my food plus I managed to cross off quite a few things on my list of things to do.

my foods for today

tea and dates in the morning, chicken, avocado, and sweet potato for lunch, shrimp lettuce wraps at night, coconut water and a banana muffin as a snack

(recipes for my meals to follow soon - they need a bit of tweaking first)

Family and Food

I was contemplating calling this post Family Feud instead of Family and Food!

I love my family, I really do, but man I really almost lost my temper when dealing with things related to food.

I understand that a lot of social functions center around food and providing tasty food is a way for people to show that they care about you and that they want to nurture you. Trust me. I'm from Bangladesh. I think our national pastime is (force)feeding others.

Over the past couple of years, I've become good about dealing with food-pushers. I know how to talk to them and explain why I'm eating the way I am. I've also become better at negotiating social situations - some days I eat off my regular plan because I have chosen to do so; other times I politely decline. I've even become known for bringing my own meals (with permission from the host/hostess).

Still. It's tough.

At home, things are good for the most part. My brother and my mom get it and are 100% supportive. When I landed in Bangladesh, I saw that my mom had bought tons of filtered water for me and had stocked up on vegetables and proteins. As a back up plan, I had brought quinoa and my homemade granola along with me. My father, on the other hand, (who is diabetic) was very different. Despite him knowing that I do the Whole Life Challenge and what it involves, he still offers me chocolate biscuits (which shouldn't be in the house anyway), cheese, sweets, etc. I try to just let it go. I don't understand why he doesn't get it, but I have resolved to not let it get to me. It does get annoying sometimes, but for the most part, I'm able to let it go - not just with my father, but with other people too.

This time, however, I was caught off guard when we had a family gathering and people were bringing dishes over to the house. Although they had been told that I eat really simply now, it didn't really go as planned. My aunts brought vegetable dishes - but they were either cooked with cream and cheese or wrapped in pastry or something else. I refused to eat - politely of course!

Everything was fine until they started complaining that I was starving myself and that I became a very picky person.

I immediately corrected them and said that I'm not picky, I'm healthy. I also told them that since I mostly eat clean, eating things that are deep friend and coated with flour and cheese will surely make me sick - did they want that for me?

I was hoping that the logical explanation would help them see my way, but they thought that I was just being silly.

I was then called rude for not eating -- but I didn't give in.

I didn't care if they were my elders and all that stuff. They were being hurtful and at some point, I really do think, you need to take a stand. You can't be bullied (yes, bullied) to eat in a way you don't want to eat.

A few years ago, I would never protest.
Then, I found myself being more disciplined, but I would still bend a lot.
Now, I don't negotiate. I only eat what I want. Whether it is healthy or unhealthy, it's my choice and I refuse to be guilted into eating something that I don't want to for the sake of someone else's satisfaction. It's not about being rude or stubborn. It's just about putting yourself first and being happy with your choice -- I guess that's always the bottom line. Be happy with whatever decision you make. You're in charge. Take control.

Working without Numbers - Part 2

Calories in vs. calories out.

We've all heard it before, right? The numbers have to work in a certain way -- you need to burn more than you eat in order to lose weight …

Do you agree?

I definitely agree with the basic principle, but for me, it doesn't work that simply.

I feel like I've been experimenting with my food for years now. I workout regularly, I eat clean, but if it all came down to calculations of calories in vs. calories out and the number on the scale, it doesn't add up.

I sometimes wonder if there's a particular ingredient that I'm eating that may be healthy but still doesn't agree with me? I'm not feeling ill or bloated or anything. I'm not even feeling lethargic or fatigued. I'm just not dropping weight like I feel I should be. It's not about muscle vs. fat. I mean, I know I've put on muscle, but it's still not enough to justify the weight.

It's frustrating. I know that I need to keep tweaking my eating and my workouts until I find the right formula -- the one that works for my body chemistry and my activity level.

The important thing is to keep going.

I know that years ago I would have thought to myself - Forget this! If I'm putting in all this effort and not seeing any results, why should I go on?

This attitude is not helpful at all. Seriously. Who will you help/hurt by eating junk food and throwing healthy habits out the window just because the numbers don't always add up? This is why it's important to keep on Working without the Numbers -- it's the effort that matters.

Daily exercise is good for you.
Eating healthy is good for you.

The reason why the numbers on the scale may not be adding up is not because you're being healthy. It's going to be because of something else. However, there should be no doubt that exercise and clean eating are healthy habits that have long term benefits.

I know it's easy to get hung up on the numbers and feel frustrated. Trust me, I feel it more often than I care to admit ... but the important thing is to not give up. Keep going. Keep trying. Take comfort in knowing you're putting forth your best effort and the results will come. Suddenly you'll find that you've got a bit more pep to your step, you can finish that extra rep with better form, and those jeans suddenly have a bit more room in them. Success comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

Stay positive and keep trying. Don't get distracted by the numbers.

The Gracie Diet/Lifestyle

I really don't like the word 'diet.' It's so often linked to words like 'deprivation' and 'restriction.' Although what I'll be trying to follow now is called the Gracie Diet what it is really comprised of is a list of guidelines as to how to group your foods. Of course the focus is on eating clean, but there are additional parameters that focus on food combinations - what foods should be paired with others for optimal energy efficiency and digestion.

Here's a short excerpt from the book:

Realizing that different foods would cause different chemical reactions within the body, Carlos narrowed his focus on food combinations. His idea was to make sure that at each meal, the foods we ate would combine to cause healthy chemical reactions. The objective was to prevent blood acidity and avoid fermentation. This would then facilitate the digestive process, which is the most energy-consuming activity of the human body.

You can read more about it here. Plus there are more details on the Gracie Diet website.

There's a 3 Phase breaking in process.

Phase 1 is to space your meals at least 4 1/2 hours apart. This is to ensure that all the food in your stomach has been completely digested before consuming other foods that may interfere with the digestion process.

This phase was tough for me at first. I was one of those people who HAD to eat every 3-4 hours, and I often grazed between meals on tea and dates/raisins/fruit. In this first phase, however, you are not allowed to snack at all -- not even a cup of coffee or tea. Just water in between meals.

As I said, it was tough for me at first, but soon my body became used to it, and although at about the 3 1/2 hour mark and definitely by the 4 hour mark I do feel quite hungry, I've been pushing through and meeting the minimum 4 1/2 hour spacing between meals. How have I felt as a result? Well, I've definitely felt lighter. I have actually come to like that bit of hunger I feel just before having a meal. It's gone hand in hand with my 100 days of Awareness. Now I've bypassed #5 (wait 20 minutes before eating again) and I'm focusing on #7: chewing my food thoroughly. I've also become more thoughtful of what I'm eating. Since I know that the meal will have to last me for about 5 hours, I ensure that my food will be filling and will provide me with enough energy to do whatever needs to be done in that time frame. I know that stuffing myself and overeating with the thought that I won't be eating for the next few hours will be counterproductive. So, I choose my foods wisely. I chew thoroughly, and I enjoy what I'm eating. Drinking a glass or two of water before my meal and staying hydrated throughout the day helps keep the hunger at bay.

Phase 2 involves cutting out sodas and desserts. I don't drink soda, so the first one wasn't an issue for me. The desserts ... well, that's been interesting. First of all, dessert is counted as a separate meal, which means that if you want to have something sweet at night, it's got to be at least 4 1/2 hours after dinner. Even if it's fruit - unless you choose to have only fruit for your dinner. Second of all, I've cut out sugar from my diet as a result of the Whole Life Challenge. I have, however, been creating 'desserts' out of different ingredients, e.g. lemon cake made with almond flour and sweetened with dates.

Instead of trying to find some sort of 'loophole' and figuring out how to incorporate those natural desserts into my meals, I've decided to eliminate them. It hasn't been easy, but it hasn't been too difficult either.

I think a lot of it has to do with what I said before about my meals. When I've created a meal that I enjoy thoroughly and really savor, then I don't feel unfulfilled and have the desire to eat something else after the meal.

As I said, it hasn't been easy, but I'm trying my best.

Finally, Phase 3. This phase involves factoring the food combinations. You can read about them here. At first it looks complicated, but I'm sure as I keep practicing and experimenting, it'll get easier.

It really doesn't seem like any foods are prohibited. They say to avoid sweets, canned foods in syrup, and a few spices and to never eat pork, but other than that, pretty much everything is permissible as long as it's eaten in the right combination.

I think it'll be an interesting experiment. I've already started trying out the food combinations. I eat so much protein and veg that it has actually been quite easy so far. I don't eat dairy (at the moment) nor am I eating any grains, so I haven't had to worry too much about the other groups.

I'm currently in Phase 2 and have already started incorporating some of the food groupings of Phase 3. I'm not getting too caught up in it at the moment as completing the Whole Life Challenge is my main focus right now.

Here are a few of my latest meals:

Breakfast

Boiled eggs, tomato and cucumber salad, carrot sticks, and half an avocado - very filling!

Lunch

Flaked salmon mixed with broccoli, peas, and slivers of sweet potatoes

Side Dish

This is one of my simplest bust most favorite sides - string beans and mushrooms cooked in a bit of sesame oil, ginger, and garlic. It goes with any type of protein. 

Liberating and Empowering - Part II

Yesterday I mentioned the Whole Life Challenge --

I know I've been mentioning it a lot lately, partly because it's starting on the 13th of September and mainly because it really has had a massive positive impact on my life. There's still time to join me and a few other members of my team (along with thousands of people worldwide) in this 8-week challenge - one that literally changed my life and may change yours too. Read more about the rules here and if you're interested, register for my team here.

What I really want to talk about in this post is what elements of the challenge made me feel liberated and empowered.

First of all, the discipline of following a challenge for the entire 8 weeks was definitely empowering. I committed to something and I stuck to it. Once I got it in my mind that I was going to do this, nothing changed my mind. I was not tempted by any foods. I was not swayed by any friends. I was fully focused. I may not have been perfect, but any imperfections were a result of my own choices.

Understanding that it was all in my hands was the second empowering discovery. I got rid of all those notions of having to eat a certain thing or a certain way to satisfy somebody else.

My family doesn't eat the same way I do.
I don't want to be a rude guest.
I don't want to be the one to spoil the mood at the party because I didn't eat/drink with them.

While these may be challenging situations, they are still manageable. You just have to understand and accept that the decision to make the change may be slightly uncomfortable (and often just to yourself). Don't let these types of thoughts (excuses) get in the way of what you really want to achieve. The discomfort is often just temporary, and usually it is because what you're doing is something new and not because it is actually physically uncomfortable.

There was a time when I was cooking different meals for myself versus others. I would go to parties and family gatherings and politely decline food. I would go to restaurants with friends and be one of 'those' people who asks questions about ingredients and food prep before ordering.

Did I get criticized? I sure did! Many, many people were negative and critical. They would make fun of me. They would tell me, 'Go on, just have one.' I was told I wasn't fun anymore. I was told that I was being too strict. I was told I was crazy (the label I hated the most).

I had to steel myself against these criticisms. I had to be strong. I tried to explain what I was doing, but very few people understood. Well, actually they just didn't take the time to really listen. For the most part, I just smiled and politely declined.

I did find myself socializing a bit less once I started the challenge. It was a bit sad, but honestly, I was so busy with everything else in my life and the challenge (planning food, grocery shopping, prepping, cooking, exercising, eating right) that it didn't matter. The best part was that each week I was noticing a difference in myself. I was getting stronger, leaner, and finally thinner! I knew this wasn't a weight loss challenge, but the consequences of cleaning up my diet and being disciplined was showing in the exact ways I wanted them to show.

I was loving it!

Didn't go to a party and have a slice of cake or a glass of wine? No problem! I was dropping dress sizes! :)

Here's the good news -- after some time (actually after the 2nd time I did the challenge), people started getting it. They started to see how I maintained most of the changes I made on the WLC even after the challenge. They started to see how it really was a lifestyle for me - not just a trend I wanted to follow.

I mastered the art of rejection -- I would call hosts beforehand and explain to them that I was doing this challenge and to please not be offended if I didn't partake in the food/drink and that I would come just for the company. I would ask those I felt more comfortable with if they would mind me bringing my own food. I had people wondering what it was I was eating so I would invite them over and cook a Whole Life Challenge friendly FEAST -- and they would see it all in action.

Can you see how this was all liberating and empowering?

I was no longer a slave to food. I knew I had the strength to say no. I was living my life the way I wanted to and I didn't look for anybody else's approval.

It was fantastic. I chose the direction that I wanted to live my life and I went ahead and did it … and those that loved me most were so supportive. As for those who criticized … well, to each their own, right?

In the end, it doesn't matter. I knew I had to continue what I was doing because I was doing this for ME.

More on that tomorrow …

Wondering About Chocolate

I don't know what happened to me yesterday, but all I wanted was chocolate. I'm not talking about wanting a tiny piece of just a taste of chocolate. No, I wanted full on chocolate - big amounts and large satisfying chunks.

I can't believe how antsy and restless that craving made me. I was grumpy and annoyed that I didn't have any. My mind kept racing about how I could get my hands on chocolate. It was pouring down with rain all day yesterday so I wasn't about to get out of the house just to buy chocolate. I couldn't just order from a delivery restaurant and have them only bring me chocolate.

Instead of seeing it as a sign, I just saw it as things being stacked up against me.

What in the world?

The only chocolate that was in the house was Bendicks mint chocolates, which is basically an after dinner mint with a thin layer of dark chocolate around it - so little chocolate that it barely makes a difference.

I skipped dinner and 4 of those instead (200 calories).

Today's reflection about my mad craving has nothing to do with the calories/sugar/fat of chocolate. It has to do with figuring out what triggered such an insane craving.

I haven't put my finger on it yet. I wonder if it was just a bad combination of being hungry, lazy, and bored?

The good thing is, not having any proper chocolate, or anything sweet really, in the house helped me avoid a massive binge.

It worries me that I still have these uncontrollable cravings where I just want to stuff my face and to hell with the consequences.

It worries me that I can even say 'to hell with the consequences' which is exactly what I was thinking yesterday.

I wonder if it was because I couldn't have any chocolate that it intensified the desire.

So many things to wonder about.

My biggest downfall to date is still my sweet tooth. Even though I know how bad sugar is for you, the logic hasn't been enough to curb the cravings.

My discipline of not buying sweets for the house is what has saved me from gorging in sweets so far.

I'm just wondering when my thoughts will catch up to my behaviors.

This change sure does come slowly ...

The Food

I know I wrote a post on staying healthy on holiday before I traveled -- I tried. I really did, but boy did the food get me.

Although there were mornings of eggs or yogurt and granola or fruit -- there were also mornings of pain au chocolats and muffins.

There were lunches/dinners of salads -- but there were also dinners of short ribs or pizza.

... and there was dessert.

I am so happy I stayed active over the holiday, but it wasn't enough. There too many periods of inactivity between workouts (lounging around, relaxing etc.) and too many calories in those indulgent meals. Add to that what felt like an endless journey back to London and I guess it's no surprise that I've gained some weight.

I know what needs to be done. It's just about doing it now.

The further challenge at this point is that I'm fasting. It's the month of Ramadan during which fasting involves no food or water from sunrise to sunset -- which is from around 3:50 a.m. to 9:15 p.m.

That's a long time to go without food or water, but that's not the part that worries me. I know the first couple of days are challenging because your body is getting used to the new routine. It does get easier.

The tough thing is the exercise. In Kuwait I would usually workout about 2 hours before it was time to break my fast. That way I would get home, shower, and be ready to eat.

However, I don't think I've ever been in a situation where sunset is SO late.

I know that I won't be doing my HIIT workouts during this time (too exhausting and they definitely make me thirsty), but I will be focusing on walking and perhaps some basic resistance training.

So, I won't be falling into a regular routine just yet but will have more of a modified one until the end of Ramadan ... and then I'll see where to go from there.

In a way, it's kind of good to go through this now as it'll be a sort of detox. The trick will be to eat the right things at the right time (isn't that always the key though) as I will be eating dinner much later than normal and will have to choose foods that will slowly release energy through the day.

Citizens was one of the restaurants at the Mandalay Bay. When ordering the chicken salad, the waiter told me that the portions were huge. He suggested sharing the salad - he would divide it into two bowls. I'm so glad he did. This photo is half a portion of the salad (I couldn't finish it -- and I didn't eat the corn or the fried bits that came with the salad). It was really good - chicken, lettuce, tomato, black beans, and avocado. However, the portion size bewildered me.

What's the point of serving such a massive salad? I wish I had taken a photo of the original size. If between 2 people it can't be completed, why serve it in the first place? Isn't it wasteful? The portion sizing in the States was overwhelming. I know people want more for their money but still -- it just seemed so wasteful to me. Still, I'm glad the waiter suggested we share the salad. It was tasty and definitely enough for two!

Cooking Adventures

One of the things I have loved the most about moving to London is the groceries. I know that sounds weird, but the local produce in Kuwait was of questionable quality, and the imported goods were rather expensive. However, more than the cost, imagine how much freshness is lost after the produce has been packaged and shipped from abroad -- by the time it has docked in the ports, been cleared through customs, and shelved in the supermarket, you can imagine the state it is in …

Here, I have 4 different supermarkets within a ten minute walk. I have a local butcher just a few minutes away. I am thrilled!

Now I know that all the labels and marketing - fresh! no preservatives! 100% natural! organic! - can be misleading, but I finally have so many items to choose from. All the labels are in English and the nutritional values are clearly marked. It's been fab!

Here are a few things I've cooked for dinner recently - recipes to hopefully follow soon:

simple chicken stir-fry 

chicken breast, onions, a variety of bell peppers, and peas 

almond crusted cod with roasted vegetables

(a recipe to add to my whole life challenge stock)

my post-workout omelet with tomatoes and half an avocado 

this is my favorite dinner so far -- baked salmon with broccolini, carrots, sugar snap peas, and mushrooms stuffed with tomato ratatouille 

I'm having so much fun grocery shopping and cooking these yummy meals! I think I need to start trying some new fruits and vegetables. There are quite a few things in the produce aisle that I've never tried. It's time to be adventurous -- and keep it healthy!

Morning Workout Mishaps

I love working out in the mornings. I usually have the gym all to myself, or at the very least, there are only a handful of people around. I like the 'me' time before I get thrown into my day. I liked the idea of getting my workout over and done with just in case something else comes up during the day or I start to feel lazy. It's all good stuff.

The empty gym at 6:45 a.m. 

A few things that I need to work on:

1. Have my gym bag, work clothes, and work bag plus post-workout food ready the night before. I've been good at having most of my stuff ready. However, most just doesn't cut it. I don't like being frantic and rushed before leaving the house. I really need to have it all prepared beforehand to avoid the morning chaos.

My morning prep 

Yes, it bugs me that my gym bag is not a shade of green to go with the gym outfit. 

2. When it comes to work clothes, I need to make sure I have all the necessary components to my outfit, because if I've forgotten something, I'm outta luck. A couple examples of things that happened to me this week:
- the pair of shoes I chose for my outfit matched perfectly -- but somehow were too big on my feet! I was slipping and sliding in them and ended up stuffing Kleenex in the toes to help me stay in place.
- the early morning haze turned into stormy clouds and I got caught in a downpour of rain while wearing a silk dress and sandals! Had I been home, I would have definitely opted for warmer clothing and my Hunter boots!

Tuesday's shoes -- love them, though after 6 hours of being on my feet - following 'leg day' at the gym, I was more than ready to kick them off! 

I may keep a spare more comfortable pair in my office at work. 

3. Since I'm not having dairy or processed foods during the WLC, my post-workout meal hasn't been the easiest to decide. I want something easy to carry, easy to eat, and filling. So far I've either been having my eggs and avocado mix or chicken with mixed vegetables. I eat half of it while I'm in the locker room and the other half after my class. The food would taste better warm, but right now I'm just eating it cold. It's all I have the time/facilities for. I'd like to think of something a little more enjoyable. For right now though, 'food is fuel' is my mantra.

Standing and Eating - A terrible habit of mine, but one I've been engaging in a lot lately.

4. I need to have my routine set. Since my time is limited, I really don't have the luxury of coming up with an impromptu workout plan. I think this will be better from next week. This week was all about testing out my timing and my energy. I now know what time I need to end my workouts by in order to have enough time to shower, change, eat, and drive to work in time for my office hours/class. I also feel a lot better since I've incorporated my sprint/HIIT training with the C25K program. I also think I'm doing alright for my weights -- I'll know more after my doctor's appointment on Saturday (wish me luck).

All in all, this first week of getting back to my gym routine followed by heading to work has been good. I definitely feel energetic after my morning workout, though I also feel really hungry throughout the day. I need to be careful of exactly how much I'm eating and make sure that I really am using food for fuel and not consuming unnecessary calories.

Back to Reality

The last few days have been a bit of a blur. That always happens after I return from a holiday. However, now that the semester has started, I feel like things are going to be a lot better since I'll actually have a bit of a routine to follow. Boy have I missed having a routine!

The past few days have been about slowly readjusting to being back home. Dad is here again -- I'm just glad that each time it's getting a bit better in terms of his and my arguments about food. I'm definitely getting a lot stronger when it comes to ignoring what people say and just brushing off food-pushers. It's a necessity. When it comes to eating right for your health, you've got to put yourself first. If I look back at last year, I can see that I was really disciplined for most of the year. However, those days when I was not disciplined caught up to me, even though they were in the minority. That realization is something that I need to keep in mind. I know that despite my good intentions, I did not end 2013 the way I had wanted to in terms of my weight. Whether it was the holiday season, the travel, the monthly bloating - whatever. I don't think there is any excuse for my weight to have gone up that much -- but it did, and I felt terrible. Now that I've been on the Whole Life Challenge for 11 days, the weight is consistently coming off and I'm feeling good. As soon as I get back into my regular workout routine, I know I'll feel even better.

There are lots of things I need to work on, and I have quite a few goals that I want to reach by the end of May. I'm still working out the details. For right now, at least until Dad leaves, I'm just doing what I can to eat healthy and get in my daily exercise. My workouts have been ok - I need to step it up a notch (or three!).

It felt so good to stock up on lots of greens and proteins. My home is a total Eat Clean zone! 

On Saturday there was a competition at our CrossFit box -- I didn't participate, but I did judge. It was fun -- I can't wait until my wrist has healed enough for me to get back to lifting weights! 

Happy

It's day 6 in Bangladesh and things are going great. The first two days had me a bit alarmed because I had to visit family members who I hadn't seen in so long -- and the way we celebrate is through food.

Lots of food.

Rich food.

And to make it worse, delicious, delicious food. Our family has been blessed (cursed) with the talent of being amazing cooks.

I ate a lot more than I thought I would, but I also enjoyed the food a LOT more than I thought I would.

It felt like I was home.

However, after 2 days, I was done.

The Whole Life Challenge started, and I was determined to stay on track as much as possible. My mom has totally been my hero helping me stay on track -- cooking me separate food, making sure I have everything I need, and most importantly, having my back when it comes to defending my food choices. It's been a relief.

I'm on Day 3 of the challenge and it's all going well.

Training with an Injury

Injuries suck.

I'm feeling so grumpy about it. I mean, I know that complaining isn't going to do me any good, but what can I say? I'm grumpy! All I want to do is hit the gym and lift some heavy weights. However, I'm trying to be sensible about it.

The weather in Kuwait is stunning at the moment. Cool mornings and evenings, warm afternoons, bright sunny skies -- really, really lovely.

Since I couldn't really do anything intense in terms of exercise, I decided to take advantage of the lovely weather and head outside for a walk/run. I had to even be cautious running because I was supposed to keep my arm as still/straight as possible. I'm sure I looked weird on the track having one arm dangling beside me -- but in any case, I went. I half walked half ran, worked up a good sweat and at least felt a bit less grumpy having gotten in some form of a workout.

Today I went into Jiujitsu class. I haven't been in a BJJ class since the end of September. I was SO HAPPY to be back!! My instructor already knew about my injury so I just took it easy and did what I could. I wrapped up my hand really, really well so that my wrist remained stabilized. I made sure not to fall or be grabbed by my right wrist. I did what I could to take the proper precautions and train safe while still being as focused on the moves as possible.

There were 2 other girls in class. They were new. One of them said she had come to Kajukenbo to watch a class and had seen me train before. Small world!

We learned a form of defense against a headlock. It was really cool. I love how the instructor breaks down the move and the builds it up. It's so interesting -- plus it's fun to do! I was totally beaming after class! (Plus I came out totally injury free; no swelling or pain - yay!)

Tomorrow I'm supposed to do weights, but I know that my routine (deadlifts, rows, bench presses) is totally out of the question. I'm thinking of maybe another run and/or some stability exercises (with a Swiss ball or Bosu ball). We'll see.

I had a big shop today. It's nice to have my normal foods back in the house again. Tonight I'm trying out a chicken dish in my crockpot. I'm still not 100% convinced about the effectiveness/efficiency of a slow cooker. I mean, yes, the meat becomes tender, but it still takes time to prep everything before putting it in the pot. If I could literally just throw in the protein and vegetables (without sauteing/browning or whatever) then I may be more convinced. For right now, I'm still trying to make up my mind.

tonight's dinner - slow cooked chicken drumsticks in tomato and onion sauce 

Do You See What I See?

The past few days have been interesting because I've been going out to eat more than usual since D's parents are visiting. So far we've been choosing restaurants where I know I can order something that will enable me to stay true to the Whole Life Challenge.

While others are eating curried potatoes, fresh hot bread, and different creamy sauces, I've been sticking to my grilled proteins and steamed or grilled vegetables.

For me, it's been fine.

However, as usual, the reactions from others have been a bit different. Luckily I haven't had any 'you're crazy' comments. Rather it's been along the lines of 'Poor you.'

Luckily, I don't feel sorry for myself at all.

Last night when a long plate of dessert samplers came out (complimentary because they had a problem with some of our orders) it was quite interesting.

Everyone dug in to taste the different desserts - chocolate fondant, apple crumble, creme brûlée, and a few others ...

I was actually a little surprised that I didn't even feel a touch of desire for desserts. That's saying a lot since I really do have a sweet tooth. However, the desserts just didn't appeal to me. It's like I was viewing my food and my eating options through a completely different lens. It felt quite good.

Interestingly enough, this morning was a slightly different story. D asked if I would bake him my carrot cake for his birthday. I was really touched because of all the possible birthday desserts he could have chosen, he wanted one of mine. I was also a bit nervous because it's been at least 2 years since I've baked a cake (though I did make some cupcakes a few times).

As I was frosting the cake, I have to say that I was really tempted to have a taste. It just looked so fresh and moist ... I didn't lament over it, but I did take a moment and think - damn that looks good. I'd love a taste.

Since I knew that everyone would be eating cake today I didn't want to really stick out as the only one not having anything, so I decided to make myself my own version of a carrot cake - one that would be Whole Life Challenge friendly.

Instead of flour I used ground flaxseed and ground almonds. I added shredded carrots, shredded coconut, and eggs. I'll post the proper recipe later.

I have to say, I was really impressed with how it came out. The recipe needs a bit of tweaking, but it was moist and quite flavorful.

Socially, it was nice to sit down and have something similar to what everyone else was eating. I got over my desire to taste my original carrot cake and took satisfaction in hearing all the oohs and aaahs from everyone else. I'm glad I haven't lost my baking touch.

I don't plan on making baked goods (whole life challenge friendly or not) often, but it's nice to know that I have a tasty option out there.

what's left of my 'real' carrot cake and my mini WLC-friendly carrot cupcakes

A Lot of Food

I've only been back at work for 1 week (and out of that, only 2 teaching days) and already this week has felt so LONG. I guess it's just adjusting to the new routine. I'm really happy that I've managed to complete 9 workouts since the beginning of September - that may also be why I'm feeling a bit wiped out. Anyway.

My brother arrived this morning :) It's great to have some family here. I'm really excited that we'll be working in the same department. It should be fun.

Today is the last day before I start the Whole Life Challenge again. My results after the first round of the Whole Life Challenge (here are details about the challenge) were really good. I was SO happy with the progress I made in just 8 weeks. My second time around was good, but not as good as the first. My heart just wasn't into it.

This time, however, I'm excited. I feel like I need something to help me push forward. I don't feel nervous about giving up different ingredients, though I will miss dairy. However, it's not the end of the world, and I know it's not difficult. It just takes a bit of planning. Almost all the dinners I have are Whole Life Challenge-friendly anyway. I've just got to figure out a few extra meals for breakfast and lunch.

I don't really believe in cheat meals, but last night and today I had my 'final' taste (at least for 8 weeks) of a few of my favorite things. My dinner last night was sushi. I enjoyed it thoroughly. I already feel the bloating from the rice, but I know it's temporary. It's a bit annoying, but I really did enjoy my meal. It was followed by ice cream - yum. Definitely a treat.

Today I had my last skinny caramel macchiato plus a chocolate brownie. Again, devilish, but I enjoyed it. Now that I've got all that out of my system, I'm totally ready to go.

Let's get this challenge started!!

Tempted by Boredom

The hardest thing for me in terms of leading a healthy lifestyle has been related to my issues with food. I feel like I’ve experimented with so many different ‘diets’ as well as eating/working out combinations – eating hardly anything/exercising a lot; eating whatever I wanted/exercising a lot; eating a little/exercising a little … None of those combinations were long-term solutions for me.

In the end, it was about eating clean (and proper portions which varied depending on the type and intensity of my workout) and being efficient with my training (i.e. when I worked out, I put my all into it, so a 20 minute CrossFit WOD was more efficient than a 1½ hour moderate cardio session).

Yes, that was definitely the winning combination.

It all started when I got more involved with CrossFit and I did the Whole Life Challenge last September. I have to say, the dietary changes I made have been really good. It was tough at first, but I managed to sustain them over the following months. However, I did relax a little. I found that I had to be really, really careful when I ‘relaxed’ my eating habits. I also realized that whatever I ‘relaxed’ my regime for ended up never really being worth it.

Practicing this type of eating habit for several months has helped me get to a much better place in terms of my relationship with food. I still have a lot of work to do, but I’m going forward with a much more eager and positive attitude versus one of dread and fears of deprivation (more on that tomorrow).

I think I managed my food intake – quality and quantity – quite well. The ONE thing that got me was when I was bored and around something to munch on. In particular, there was one night when I was on my own, I couldn’t sleep, and there was some chocolate in the room. I was watching TV and I mindlessly ate the chocolate. It’s not the calories or the (lack of) nutritional value of the chocolate that bothered me; it’s the fact that I ate it when I didn’t need to or even really want to. I was bored. It was there. I gave in.

This is something that I’m not proud of and definitely something that I want to keep track of in the future. I need to have more control over this silly mindlessness because really, I am stronger than that. I am more disciplined than that. At this point in my life, after all I’ve been through and tried, I really should know better. I do know better. I’m going to do my very best to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

Momentary Routine

I’ve been back in Kuwait for 5 days now … and I’ll be traveling again in 4 days. That’s not much time to get back into a proper routine. After my last trip to London, I really struggled. I let the fact that I was only around for 9 days bring me down and distract me from what I really wanted.

Not this time.

I arrived on Tuesday morning and spent the day resting. Last time, I spent the time freaking out and worrying about whether or not I would have energy to go to the gym. I exhausted myself. I didn’t workout, and I felt guilty.

Not this time.

I unpacked, did my laundry, and I SLEPT. I was so tired. I slept for 4 hours in the afternoon and then I went to bed early. I needed the sleep. I felt much better after getting all that sleep.

When I woke up on Wednesday morning (tossing and turning from 3 a.m. and finally out of bed at 4 a.m.), I was ready to go.

I had 2 eggs with some mushrooms and tomatoes. I took my time getting ready and leaving the house (after all, I am on vacation!), and I made it to the gym by 7:45 a.m.

Some cardio and a body balance session was all I had planned for the day. The cardio felt good. I felt like I hadn’t missed anything because of all the walking I did in London. Body Balance, however, was tougher. I felt quite stiff. I didn’t stretch much over the past 2 weeks and it totally showed in class. (Note to self: get back to stretching daily!!)

Thursday was great – warm-up cardio, 1 hour weight session, and then 1 hour on the cross-trainer.

I really wanted to burn some calories so I just got on the cross-trainer, set it to interval training, and just zoned out and started sweating.

The weight lifting session was interesting. On the one hand, I felt strong. I think this is because I hadn’t lifted weights for quite some time so my muscles actually felt rested. On the other hand, I felt like I lost a bit of strength, particularly in my lateral pull-downs … but then, I’ve always struggled with those. I did 2 extra sets of each exercise with lighter warm-up weights. I didn’t want to strain myself (though I think I did when I was doing 15 kg (33 lb dumbbell per hand) dumbbell incline chest presses. It wasn’t the chest press as much as it was the movement of getting my arm in position to do the chest press). Anyway. I left the gym feeling good that I could complete those sets, but also felt a bit of a muscle strain around my left shoulder blade area. Must take care of that.

I went back to my normal Friday routine – which included 2 hours of Jiujitsu and sparring practice. Again, being away from training for 2 weeks really showed on the mats. It took me a while to both mentally and physically gear up for each move we practiced.

Yesterday I did something I had not done in a long time – burpees. I’ve been avoiding them. I’m avoiding them for the same reason that I took on this challenge – I hate them. They’re tough. They leave me breathless. I suck at them. 

This is why I must practice them!!

Perhaps I was too ambitious in my goal of completing 20,130 burpees by the end of the year, but that’s not an excuse not to practice them at least every other day, if not every single day.

The only thing holding me back is my mind – I am physically able to do them. In fact, the first 50 burpees (though tough) went down a lot easier than I had thought they would be. (Note to self: Stop second-guessing yourself and just do your damn burpees!)

So basically my strategy has been to just get back into my routine without giving it much thought. Being on vacation makes it very tempting to just sit back and do nothing but watch TV or read all day … but that doesn’t mean I can’t squeeze in an hour or two of exercise. I know that once I get started, I feel good – that’s why I try to workout first thing in the morning. At least I get it out of the way.

My food has been good since I got back. Like my workouts, I just went right back on plan. Lots of salads, lean protein, and vegetables. I bought some new spice blends in London - ones you can't get here in Kuwait - so that's helped give a bit of new flavor to my cooking.  I would say that my food is 90-95% clean. At the moment, that works for me. Gotta make the most of being home while I can. In 4 days, this momentary routine is going to seem like a dream … that’s when the real work is going to kick in!

By the way, my shoulder blade muscle strain is much, much better. Whew.