Food for Thought

I find it so ironic that I woke up this morning and did not want to eat at all. I wasn't as hungry as I usually am in the morning, and nothing was appealing. I usually have a bowl of cereal in the mornings and on the weekends I might have something a bit different - a bagel with cream cheese or waffles ... but this morning I couldn't care less.

How do I go from being absolutely ravenous for the past four days to not wanting to even look at food? I forced myself to have a bit of cereal because I don't want to get into the habit of skipping meals ... but I didn't taste it at all. Just chewed and swallowed.

For lunch, I stared at the list of food options and nothing leaped out at me ... I then broke down the ingredients and tried to see if I could get creative. I usually just go for the soup and salad (quick and easy) ... but I wanted something different. As I said, I didn't want to skip a meal, and I don't want to get to the point where I don't enjoy my food (because I know that I will end up skipping meals - which has terrible consequences: risk of binging, dizziness, low blood pressure, irritation, messing with metabolism and so forth), so I ended up having a tuna fish sandwich. I know that doesn't sound exciting, but I haven't had a sandwich in ages. I think in the past two weeks I've only eaten bread once - bagel for breakfast - so I thought perhaps something new would stimulate my taste buds.

It's frustrating when you have to work this hard to figure out what to eat. I know there are so many healthy options - plus I still have a stash of emergency pre-measured healthy food in the freezer, but I just didn't feel like eating any of it. The tuna fish sandwich was fine. Nothing too exciting ...

Perhaps I'm still tired from last night. Another great party last night (October seems to be the party month!) which meant lots more dancing. The food part was actually a bit tough -- it's kind of hard to explain without going into some back story, but to keep it as short as possible - I used to eat at this friend's house frequently several years ago - and there are certain finger foods that are to die for and that I loved. It's been a few years since I've had any of them, so seeing some old big time favorites on the table made me hesitate a bit ... I wasn't really tempted. I just had a flashback of memories and how good those foods tasted. So for just a few seconds I hesitated in front of the table full of carbs and fried food - however, I headed straight to the broiled shrimp and ate a few of those, had two mini pizzas and that was it. I focused on socializing and dancing instead.

On the drive home - close to 3 a.m. - D&I were talking about old habits. I remembered when years ago I would have been heading home from a party around the same time and would just get a craving for some drive-thru ... and would often end up eating a McD's burger of some sort at 3 a.m. -- D had similar experiences ... It's great to know neither of us was even tempted to stop by at one of the four fast food joints that were on the way. I don't even remember the last time I ate at a fast food joint. I know part of it has to do with not eating meat or chicken, but even that change is relatively recent (3 years this November).

It was good to take a moment to reflect and remember that changes can happen. I don't miss eating fast food at all. Sure it's quicker than going out and buying fresh ingredients and preparing a meal at home ... but there's really no comparison to the quality and taste of the food. After reminiscing about my old eating habits and seeing where I am now, I can confidently say that even when I eventually reach my goal weight I will not be tempted by fast food. I'm not saying that I won't be tempted by any foods -- but places like McDonalds, Burger King, etc. are not longer even on my radar.

Another birthday later today ... it's my friend whose favorite foods are fruit and salad :) so I know I'll be safe in terms of food choices tonight :)