Monday, May 21, 2012

Feeling Frantic

I didn't go to the gym today. At one point I thought I'd make up for it by doing a workout at home, but that didn't happen either. I feel slightly guilty, but maybe not as guilty as I should feel for skipping a workout despite all my good intentions to stick to the plan I created earlier this week. I just didn't get around to it. I stayed home in the morning and started going through the mountains and mountains of papers that I've got in my office. The piles have been driving me crazy. I keep putting it off and once I got started in the morning, that was it. I couldn't stop.

Dragged myself away just to go to work and teach my last class of the semester (yay!). Then I came back home and picked up where I left off. I'm not sure I can explain how many papers I've got. It's insane. Four years of research, data notes, drafts of articles etc. etc. are completely overwhelming me.

I took a break to work on something for my supervisor. It ended up taking quite a bit longer than I had anticipated but I had to get it done today.

The only time I left my office was to go into the kitchen and tidy up in there. Things had been washed but not put away. Dinner had to be cooked, and then of course everything had to be washed and put away. I know this is daily stuff that people go through but today it felt overwhelming.

To add to it all, I'm tired. I don't get it. I haven't felt this tired in a long time. Still, I felt like today was one of those days where even if I had made it to the gym, my workout probably would have sucked. It's better that I stayed at home was and was actually productive in doing something.

I'm just starting to feel a little frantic now.

I feel like I've just been coping for the past few days instead of being fully engaged with what I'm doing. I don't like this feeling. At the same time I am feeling really overwhelmed. Not only do I have so much to do, but most of the tasks require a lot of time. From past experience I've seen that I overwhelm myself with tons of tasks and in the end I get so flustered and frantic that I get nothing done at all.

I need to get a grip. I just have to tackle things one at a time and steadily make my way through all these tasks. I know I'm being really whiny today. I really don't feel like myself for some reason. As I said, I need to get a grip!


  1. Give yourself a break, my friend. You have a ton on your plate right now and it is okay if you don't make it to the gym. That doesn't make you any less focused or dedicated to your health & fitness. Sometimes fixing other external stressors (like your paper work & work in general) will help clear your mind and you will feel better.

    I know it's all easier said than done, but take a deep breath and try not to be so hard on yourself. You are human and you can only do so much in one day!!

    1. Thanks Jenn. I am trying to be better at not feeling guilty when I do actually slow down and take it easy a little. It'll take some practice though :)

  2. Deep breath! The work will still be there tomorrow. :) I find making lists and setting daily priorities helps me figure out which things NEED to get done. :)

    You'll get caught up!


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